


normal relationships

by tal_5



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Food, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Platonic Kissing, Romantic Fluff, Swearing, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:41:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27461377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tal_5/pseuds/tal_5
Summary: “I don’t know,” Patton murmurs as he shrugs, pocketing his phone after sending the text. “It’s just sweet, you know, how well you know each other.”This leaves Virgil fumbling for a reply, is it sweet? He and Roman have been best friends since they were young and yes, maybe they’re closer than most, but is it that unusually sweet to know each other’s schedules?Virgil constantly receives weird, knowing looks from his friends whenever he and Roman are together, but for the life him, can't figure out what they mean.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 12
Kudos: 107





	normal relationships

**Author's Note:**

> this was an ask on tumblr, but I like it, so here!  
> prompt: 'a kiss after yearning for it for far too long'

“What class does he have right now?”

“Scriptwriting,” Virgil says. “So, he should be done in half an hour.”

Beside him, Patton smiles, small and fond, as he types in a message to who Virgil assumes is Janus. “It’s nice that you know that.”

Virgil’s brows furrow slightly as he checks the time. “What do you mean? Of course I do.”

“I don’t know,” Patton murmurs as he shrugs, pocketing his phone after sending the text. “It’s just sweet, you know, how well you know each other.”

This leaves Virgil fumbling for a reply, is it sweet? He and Roman have been best friends since they were young and yes, maybe they’re closer than most, but is it that unusually sweet to know each other’s schedules? Before he can delve too deep into wondering whether his relationships are normal, footsteps jog up the pavement towards them.

“Stormy! I finished early.”

Immediately, his chest fills with sunlight and he jumps to his feet, allowing himself to be dragged into a strong hug. He quickly drowns in a citrus, ginger scent mixed with the sharpness of leather. Easily recognisable as Roman’s go-to cologne. Quite unintentionally, he leans into it, burying his face in the shoulder of Roman’s jacket and ignoring the rumble of laughter he can feel against his chest. He’s too tired to be embarrassed and just squeezes Roman’s torso once before pulling away.

“How was scriptwriting?”

Roman shrugs, smiling. “It was okay. I have stuff I need to work on, but I’m doing better!”

Behind them, Patton applauds, giggling when Roman steps to the side and bows dramatically. Virgil snorts and rolls his eyes, clapping along with Patton until they decide to head off to Janus’s bar where the others will be meeting them. Well, it’s not Janus’s bar, but that’s what they like to call it because Janus has made it his second home. He drinks, but only socially and really, only works there for the food and the banter. His boss, Teddy, is fun and usually gives them all a ten percent discount on food.

As they walk, Virgil takes Roman’s offered arm and pretends not to see the strange smile Patton gives them. Other students greet them and bid them farewell as they round the corner, all either hurrying home or to their own meet-ups. Virgil watches Roman’s interactions carefully, bubbles, definitely holographic and beautiful, popping and shifting pleasantly in his stomach as he notes the pure warmth and geniality constantly radiating from his friend. It hasn’t always been that way; Roman was once hostile towards most people, absolutely refusing to trust them and constantly finding reasons to assume they were up to something. Virgil used to be one of those people he questioned.

Now, though, he thrives in social situations, effortlessly gaining new friends and making people fall head over heels in love with him. He’s known at least four other people who have been infatuated with him, including two of their friends. Man, when Logan had admitted a three month crush on Roman to Virgil, they’d been laughing about it for weeks after. Because, according to Logan, ‘it did _not_ last long.’

Logan would later confess to moving on from Roman to Remus, which, in Virgil’s opinion, both made a lot of sense and absolutely no sense whatsoever. To this day, Logan still has no idea how or when it happened. Virgil just thinks it’s hilarious and supports/teases him whenever he gets the opportunity.

“Stormy. Earth to stormy?”

Eyes refocusing, Virgil blinks a couple of times until he realises he’s been openly staring at Roman for Lord knows how long. His skin from hairline to chest heats up and he straightens his back. “Sorry. I zoned out there.”

Roman laughs and squishes their linked arms between them, pushing his hair out of his face. “It’s okay, we just couldn’t get through to you for a while. Are you all right?”

“Yeah, I’m good. Just thinking.”

“About what?”

Virgil has the horrible thought of saying something sappy and embarrassing, but instead decides on, “Stuff. Nothing bad.”

Chuckling softly, Roman twists Virgil’s nose ring until it sits properly against his skin again. “Truly, a mystery until the very end, huh.”

Something very familiar slams into Virgil’s chest, forcing its way up his throat, desperately trying to get to his brain. Or, that’s what it feels like at least; it feels like some omnipotent force is trying to tell him something he’s just too dense to understand. Even so, he smiles as always, making some joke about being the very darkness of midnight and slapping Roman’s shoulder when he disagrees.

This is normal. Logan acts like this around Remus all the time.

 _Wait_.

Well, Patton and Janus act in a similar way, too! He’s normal.

They are normal.

* * *

Later that evening, something happens that finally, _finally_ , burns that _thing_ from this afternoon into his mind.

Virgil is sitting with his usual group, in their usual booth, with their usual orders on the table in front of them. He’s snacking on his fries, Roman’s arm slung over his shoulders, when someone taps on his arm. Of course, it’s Logan wanting to head to the bathroom, having one of his daily breakdowns about how infuriating it is to crush on someone, especially if that someone is Remus.

He turns to Roman, placing a hand on his bicep and leaning in to talk over the music.

“Just heading to the bathroom with Logan,” he says, sliding his drink closer to Roman as a silent request to keep it safe, then rolling his eyes as Roman darts forward and sneaks a kiss to his cheek. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

The pair laugh as he shuffles out of the booth and follows Logan to the men’s bathroom. Almost instantly, Logan is hitting his head against the wall and then leaning back against the sinks. Virgil sighs and stands beside him, arms folded over his chest and head tilted towards the ceiling. “What did that _bitch_ do this time?”

Logan doesn’t answer as he usually does though, remaining silent and holding his face in his hands. Heart sinking, Virgil looks down at him properly and moves in closer, nudging him gently.

Finally, he says, “This is unbearable.”

“Remus?”

Without answering the question, Logan pushes himself away from the sink he’s against and pulls his own hair, sighing loudly. “Why him? Why? Out of everyone…”

He trails off for a moment before continuing, though his voice is much more uneven than it had been before. “Couldn’t it have been Patton? Or, at least someone I can actually predict? At least then, I would be able to get some sort of idea as to whether my feelings are returned or not. With Remus, it’s quite literally _impossible_.”

“Logan, it’ll be okay, y’know?”

“I know, logically, that it will, but as of right now, nothing is okay.”

“I get that.”

Logan laughs, somewhat bitter. “ _Do_ you? Really?”

Virgil frowns, brows furrowing. “I’ve liked people before, y’know?”

“Oh my God, you still haven’t figured⏤”

“Look, L,” Virgil starts, voice perhaps a little bit harder than he intends it to be. “Don’t get angry with me, it’s not like it’s my fault. I help how I can because I know this sucks, but I can’t just make it go away. So, don’t get all bitchy at me.”

The bathroom is silent for a moment, only the tiny echoes of water droplets falling into the sink filling the room, and Virgil is tempted to just apologise to end the quiet. But he stands his ground and Logan falters, sighing heavily yet again as he lets himself collapse back against the wall, head lowered.

“I’m sorry.”

Virgil nods, moving to stand with him again, squeezing his hand tightly once and letting go. “It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean to.”

Logan shakes his head. “Of course not. You’re right, there’s no one to blame for this, which is probably why it’s so frustrating.”

“I mean,” Virgil says with a laugh, “haven’t we been blaming Remus this whole time?”

“True. How did I develop a crush on such a feral human being?”

Logan’s the one who asks this, laughing again as he does so, but he’s also the one who answers it. “I mean, he’s good… a good man. Chaotic, definitely, but that’s what makes him so fun, I think. Attractive, funny, all the usual attributes people desire in a partner. And he really, really knows me.”

“Apparently, not as well as I thought.”

This is going to be awkward. Neither of them want to look up and acknowledge the situation they’ve got themselves into because they know it’s just going to be so mercilessly awkward. But they do and their worst fears manifest in the form of Remus standing by the bathroom door, holding it open and staring at Logan with an unreadable expression on his face.

Logan is completely rigid as he asks, “How much of that did you hear?”

“Uh, I heard you blaming me for something and listened in, worried I’d upset you or something. And then… Yeah.”

He doesn’t look mad, disgusted, like he’s about to cry or anything Logan has worried about for the last few months, but he doesn’t look happy either.

Taking a deep breath, Logan shakes his head and swallows, zipping up his jacket and throwing the hood over his head. Before he shoves past Remus and runs out the bar into the now pouring rain, he meets Remus’s gaze and speaks in such a broken voice, he doesn’t sound like himself anymore. “I can’t⏤”

Virgil and Remus hurry after him, the latter rushing ahead as Virgil jogs to their booth and explains to the others what happened. After seeing their shocked expressions, he feels a cold stab of guilt and wonders whether he’s just betrayed Logan’s trust. The others pack up and make their way to the entrance, though they stop when they spot Remus limping back to the bar, head down.

Before they can even ask, he smiles sadly and shrugs. “He drove off before I could reach him.”

“Oh,” Virgil mutters, twisting the ends of his sleeves and feeling the guilt slice at him more than ever.

Remus seems to notice this, however, and shakes his head. “Don’t. It’s not your fault, dork.”

Virgil attempts a smile. “Don’t you call me a whale pe⏤.”

He’s interrupted by Roman covering his mouth with one hand, rambling about his ‘sweet stormy’s innocence’ and gently lecturing Remus about telling every moving thing under the sun that gross fact. Virgil, again, shoves down that _thing_ trying to… warn him about something, maybe? Probably a warning, everything is to him. Instead, he plays along to distract himself.

Roman snorts. “Licking my hand isn’t going to do anything, sweetheart.”

Virgil pouts, though it can’t be seen behind Roman’s hand, and pleads for Remus to rescue him. And despite the remaining hurt in his eyes, Remus teases his wet hands through Roman’s perfect hair, earning an indignant screech and smack to the head. He laughs, but it doesn’t travel as far around the bar as it typically would.

* * *

“Do you think Logan’s okay?”

Roman smiles, all compassion and safety, and reaches over to take one of Virgil’s hands in his own. “Lo’s a tough cookie, he’ll be fine.”

Taking a moment to soak in the heat from Roman’s hand, Virgil closes his eyes and nods, placing his free hand over the top of Roman’s. He’s always been the anthropomorphised version of a space heater, radiating an excessive amount of warmth and drawing Virgil in like a moth to a near-literal flame. Like now, he finds himself resting his forehead against the back of Roman’s hand and breathing softly. Anxiety is a wild thing, but the right person can ease it a little. Not much because it’s impossible to simply love anxiety away, but it… helps.

Roman shushes him, assuring him that Remus will talk to Logan. “Or, since Logan is especially smart, he might get in touch with Remus first.”

“Maybe.”

“Well, either way, they’ll be okay in the end,” he says as if it is fact rather than speculation. “Therefore, you don’t need to worry. We can get ice-cream, give Lo some space, and _then_ text him. Sound good?”

Virgil chews his lip for a moment before nodding. “I’m just going to send one thing, then I’ll give him all the space in the universe.”

Roman chuckles. “That’s a lot of space.”

As he sends the message, Virgil finally lifts his head to look at his best friend, forever grateful to have him always right there. He’s a little startled at the very glossy, overwhelming look Roman is giving him, but sits up anyway and shuffles closer. “Thanks. I, y’know, appreciate you being here.”

“Always.”

And something happens. Something completely normal and not at all unusual, though right then it feels like such a thing has never happened before. Roman smiles his usual crooked, perfect smile, and strokes the underside of Virgil’s chin. It doesn’t even last five seconds and yet, his brain is invaded by what that thing before actually was; a plea.

_Please._ **_Please_ ** _, you’re so in love with him, it’s fucking you up._

“Oh,” he whispers, like an idiot.

Roman’s forehead creases, lips pressing down into a confused line. “What?”

“Oh, God. Uh, no.”

“No?”

“I meant,” Virgil scrambles through his verbal vomit for something that makes sense, “nothing. I was zoning out again.”

Roman’s mouth now falls into a worried frown. “Again? Are you sure there’s nothing wrong?”

Panicked and only half-there, Virgil decides his grave needs to be deeper, so he digs. “Uh, no!”

“ _No?_ ”

“I mean, yes! I’m sure. Sorry, I think I’m just a little… all over the place, right now.”

“No kidding… Look, do you need to forego ice cream? I can take you home and you can get some rest.”

Oh, Virgil could not be alone with Roman. Not right now. How is he supposed to act?

“Yeah, that would be best, I think. I’m really sorry.”

His usual goofy grin back on his face, Roman shrugs and starts Remus’s car, letting it heat up a bit before grabbing his phone to text his brother and ask him to finish his drink and⏤

“Are we taking Virgil home or not?” A voice teases from the backseat.

They spin, both whacking at Remus for not making his presence known sooner and immediately apologising as he playfully lectures them on leaving him behind with a sprained ankle. Virgil definitely flushes red from his roots to his toes, realising that Remus had just been watching the _exact_ moment Virgil realised he’s in love with…

Oh God.

* * *

Six days. Virgil has been avoiding Roman for six days and it’s starting to become obvious.

Not that Virgil has ever been particularly talented at ‘subtlety’ if he’s actually trying. Because, little did he fucking know, he’s been subtly flirting with Roman for years! Or… a very long time, at least.

He heaves yet another long sigh, laid spread-eagle on his bed and vaguely listening to the tv show he has playing in the background. Deep down, he knows he can’t just cut Roman out completely, nor would he want to. It would go well beyond unfair and well into toxic behaviour. What does he say to excuse it, though? He hates lying, but the only other option he’d have is to confess to his best friend of eight years that he’s in love with him. Not a chance.

No, he can survive one more day without Roman and come up with a good lie to hold himself up for now. Maybe one day he would be so past this that he could fess up and tell Roman the truth.

The thought of one day being completely open and honest about this makes Virgil feel better for all of ten seconds. Keeping such a lie a secret for too long would, probably, be impossible. So, maybe telling one other person will help? Just like Logan did with him.

He sighs and picks his phone up from where it’s lying on his bed, opening his messages to find one from Logan, four from Roman and one from Patton. Perfect. He opens his conversation with Patton, apologising profusely to Roman in his mind as he ignores his messages, and begins to type.

> **_You_ **
> 
> _I like Roman_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _I love Roman what the fuck am I supposed to do now_

It takes Patton only a few minutes to reply, but those minutes feel like hours.

> **_Patton_ **
> 
> _I know, Virge xx_
> 
> **_Patton_ **
> 
> _Tell him how you feel. I honestly think he feels the same xx_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _that’s a cute thought and everything, pat, but no he doesn’t xx_

> **_Patton_ **
> 
> _How do you know??xx_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _patton_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _babe_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _look at him and then look at me xx_
> 
> **_Patton_ **
> 
> _Just have. Don’t see your point xx_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _you’re the best hype man, patton, but I’m literally a bowl of unfinished, melted, expired ice cream compared to him xx_
> 
> **_Patton_ **
> 
> _I strongly disagree and so would Roman xx_
> 
> **_Patton_ **
> 
> _Just think about telling him, okay? I really, really think it’ll go well xx_
> 
> **_You_ **
> 
> _not a chance. I’d rather wallow in my own misery than risk it going badly xx_

Patton sends him a few more words of comfort before apologising and leaving for work. And so, Virgil is doomed to spend the rest of his night laying about his room and trying not to cry.

Until there comes a knock at his window.

He throws himself upwards, sitting and shining the flashlight of his phone at his window. Roman is standing on the roof of his parents’ conservatory and peeking through his bedroom window as best he can.

“Christ, Roman,” Virgil hisses, moving to the window and opening it, grabbing both of his friend’s arms and pulling him inside. “What the hell were you thinking? You could’ve fallen!”

“Why have you been avoiding me?”

Roman’s tone is so clipped, it sends Virgil into complete silence. Of course, he and Roman have fought before. Giving each other the silent treatment, yelling and crying and storming away from one another has all occurred before. Not often, but it has. But Roman has never sounded so _pained_ before. So frustrated and upset. He’s only come up with an outline of his lie, so it won’t be all that believable, but he may as well give it a shot.

“I’m so sorry, I’ve just been feeling really off because of what happened and talking to anyone just…”

He trails off, giving Roman a half-assed desperate look before sighing. They sit in an uncomfortable quiet for a while, neither quite knowing how to break it. Roman doesn’t even look at him, not angry, but still visibly hurt. After another minute or so, he sighs sadly.

“Why are you lying? If I’ve done something to you, I want to know so I can apologise. Or, if something’s happened and you don’t want to talk about it, I understand that, too. But please don’t lie, you hate lying.”

“I know I do,” Virgil says, voice a near-whisper and eyes glued to the carpet. “I’m really sorry. You haven’t done anything wrong, I promise.”

Roman frowns, concerned. “Then… did something else happen?”

He can’t lie. “Kind of. But also, not really. A personal thing that… kind of… involves you?”

Despite this being a very internal feeling, Virgil can see how fast and hard Roman’s heart drops, eyes widening and shoulders tensing. “But… But you promised that I didn’t do anything.”

“You haven’t,” Virgil says, though it sounds insincere.

“Virgil, what is wrong? You’re really scaring me.”

Fiery frustration burns up his arms, down his legs, until finally it scorches his throat. This, again, is a plea. _Just tell him. Tell him everything. You’re so tired, you hurt so much._

“I’m just so fucking pathetically in love with you, Roman. Okay? And this is a very recent thing, so I don’t exactly know what to do with it.”

“You are… in love with me?”

“Yes.”

Roman says absolutely nothing for at least twelve hours, or that’s what it feels like, until he crawls forward and sits directly in front of him, holding Virgil’s hands so tenderly in his own. Then, he laughs a bit hysterically, and Virgil doesn’t really know whether that’s a good thing or not, but it’s definitely not what he was expecting. He then shakes his head and presses a kiss to the back of one of Virgil’s hands, a beaming smile forcing his teeth into view. The smile looks painful, but he looks so happy.

He keeps Virgil’s fingers pressed against his lips, closing his eyes and laughing softly to himself. Now, Virgil doesn’t want to assume anything, but by the wide grin on his face and his nonsensical laughter, Virgil is beginning to think Roman has gone a bit insane. Even so, he loves seeing Roman happy and smiles along with him. “You doing okay, there?”

“You _bastard_ ,” Roman manages through his laughter, pressing another few dozen kisses to Virgil’s hands and then laughing some more. “You couldn’t have discovered this sooner? Instead, you leave me pining all by myself for _ages_.”

Virgil can’t breathe suddenly. “P-Pining?”

“God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to kiss you and hold you and just…” Roman says instead of answering his half-formed question.

Without thinking, Virgil glances down at Roman’s lips and swallows, opening his mouth to speak. “Then, kiss me.”

Roman’s eyes instantly snap up to meet his and he takes a deep breath to steady his breathing. “Really?”

His tone has changed; it’s darkened and lowered, and it sends bolts of electric up Virgil’s spine. He slips his hands out of Roman’s grasp and runs the fingers of one hand through Roman’s hair, the other laying on his cheek. “ _Please_ , Roman.”

And nothing more needs to be said.

They meet in the middle, Roman gripping the front of his shirt and tugging him forwards, tilting his own head to the side and leaning into the hand still on his cheek. Everything is so much hotter than he’d imagined, despite Roman being a literal radiator. The hands trailing down his sides, the breath breezing across his cheeks, and the kiss itself are overwhelmingly warm, leaving no room for cold feet. Not that he would ever want to run from this.

He’s pulled closer, chest to chest, and his arms automatically worm around Roman’s neck, one hand still pulling and petting his hair gently. The kiss moves so fluidly, it almost feels as if they’ve done this a thousand times before, but realistically, Virgil is following Roman’s lead and is so sure he’s about to faint that he grips Roman’s hair and jacket a little bit harder.

Roman takes in a shaky breath, manoeuvring so the kiss is firmer and more heated than Virgil expects. And in the change, he makes quite a pathetic sound in the back of his throat, desperate and emotional. But this only seems to make Roman hold him closer, movements softer and calmer now.

Then, they pull apart and Virgil takes a deep breath, leaning his forehead against Roman’s and gulping down against the nerves still twisting in his throat. Roman grins at him.

“If that wasn’t enough, I love you, too.”

Virgil laughs and shakes his head. “Oh, really? Never would have guessed.”

* * *

The next morning, he wakes up with Roman’s arm curled around his stomach and he smiles. He reaches over to his nightstand and picks up his phone, finally forcing himself to go through his unread messages. Roman’s are a little upsetting, as he assumed they would be, but with the same man breathing against his ear, he can’t find it in himself to be too sad about it. Then, he reads Logan’s and he grins wider.

And sends back one of his own.


End file.
